EXT. CITY STREET
It's 2:15 am on a Friday and the bars have just closed down.
JASON is trying to seal the deal with CHRYSTAL, an incredibly
ugly woman who may or may not be a transvestite.
JASON
Why don't we go back to my place?
I have some good wine we could open
and just keep this party goin.
CHRYSTAL
Yeah, that sounds like a good idea
Jason and Chrystal start to kiss. He pulls away and holds a
single finger up to her lips.
JASON
Let me go get us a cab
Jason walks to over to the curb and holds out his hand to
flag down a taxi. Almost instantly a checkered cab pulls up.
He holds the door open for Chrystal and helps her in the car.
JASON (CONT'D)
(To the cabbie)
21st and Pine, please. And don't
take Broad street.
The cab driver looks a little annoyed by Jason telling him
how to do his job and mutters something incoherent under his
breath.
JASON (CONT'D)
What did you just say?
The cab driver mumbles something undecipherable again.
JASON (CONT'D)
Hey man, you can forget about a tip
unless you tell me what you're
saying.
CAB DRIVER
I said "You're on the Cash Cab!"
The interior of the car lights up and music starts playing.
CHRYSTAL
Oh shit! I seen this shit on TV!
With the lights turned all the way up in the cab Jason can
now see that he has definitely picked up a transvestite. He
looks horrified.
CAB DRIVER
You have the next 28 blocks until
your stop to answer as many
questions correctly as you can.
But if you give three wrong
answers, we will drop you off
whereever we are. You guys want to
play?
Jason is still stunned but he tries to say "No" but is cut
off by Chrystal who is really excited.
CHRYSTAL
Fuck yeah we playin!
(to Jason)
I can't believe we in the Cash Cab!
CAB DRIVER
Ok, here is your first question:
This part of the body only found in
50% of humans is also known as the
Layrngeal Prominance and is found
on the front of the throat.
Chrystal looks completely stumped and Jason continues to look
totally embarrassed.
JASON
The, um, the uh. The Adam's Apple?
CAB DRIVER
That's correct for $50!
Chrystal cheers and tries to give Adam a big kiss but he
ducks out of the way and they end up in an awkward hug.
Question two is another 50 dollar
question: What is the average age
girls begin menstruating?
Jason looks at Chrystal and she gives a "deer in headlights"
look back to Jason.
CHRYSTAL
Um. 17?
The cab driver laughs accidentally and then collects himself.
CAB DRIVER
I'm sorry, the answer is 13
Jason stares very hard at Chrystal who looks the complete
other direction, refusing to make eye contact with her date.
Question 30 is going to be a
little bit harder but it's worth a
hundred bucks: This type of
chemical therapy goes by the
initials HRT and is used most
commonly by people with gender
identity disorder.
CHRYSTAL
Hormone Replacement Therapy!
CAB DRIVER
That is correct again for another
hundered dollars!
Jason's eyes get huge as the gravity of what is happening
sinks in. He looks physically ill
CHRYSTAL
YAY!
CAB DRIVER
Okay, question four is also worth a
hundred dollars: This type of
professional establishment is most
often visited on Saturday and
Sunday mornings after anonymous and
unwanted sexual encounters often
caused by excessive binge drinking.
JASON
Fuck this.
Jason opens the door of the moving cab and rolls out of the
car.
CHRYSTAL
Jason!
CAB DRIVER
Well that is a cash cab first.
Chrystal and the cab driver sit there stunned for a moment
trying to figure out what to do. Chrystal perks up and has a
bit of an "a ha" moment.
CHRYSTAL
Oh! Free health clinic! That's
the answer!
END
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